I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
