Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
