So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
