I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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