What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I think your dad took our porno
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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