does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
