Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
