i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
