haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
