I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
