You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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