My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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