You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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