..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
