Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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