I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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