theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
MIDGETS
????
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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