is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
