Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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