By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
