can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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