White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
My pussy is not your playground.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
She bit a glass in half.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
