so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
