There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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