at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
