Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I still have a little drunk in my system
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
