when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
