she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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