I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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