I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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