He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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