Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
