You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
