So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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