do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize