ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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