Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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