Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize
