she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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