just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize