imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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