i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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