the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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