They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
