break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
