just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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