i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize