Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
