it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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