This girl is more easily done than said...
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
