can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
you had me at cake vodka
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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